Today I received the results of my teenage daughter’s achievement test from the public school. If you have been reading for the past few weeks then you already know about the IQ test results. If not, here is the link to read about my surprise at her new IQ despite having FAS. My daughter has been at homeschool with me for the past four years. I removed her from public school for several reasons. I felt they were not trying to challenge her; she was stealing, forging... more

“If women were convinced that a day off or an hour of solitude was a reasonable ambition, they would find a way of attaining it. As it is, they feel so unjustified in their demand that they rarely make the attempt.”

Does this quote by Anne Morrow Lindbergh sound familiar in your life? I know it certainly does in mine.

Sometimes I have several instances of the same topic come up in a short period of time so it’s something that I take notice of. This is one of those times.

Recently I saw a production of “Jesus Christ Superstar”... more

It seems like everyone around me is either pregnant or knows someone who is pregnant. For new birthmothers and even not so new birthmothers dealing with friends or family members who are pregnant, baby showers, and all the festivities that goes along with a happy pregnancy can be emotional.

For me personally, I want to be supportive and genuinely happy for friends that are pregnant but sometimes it is difficult, especially if the circumstances of their life are similar to what mine were during my pregnancy that resulted in making an adoption plan. I am... more

According to a new government report, the number of teens giving birth has risen for the first time in 15 years. For every one thousand young women, between the ages of 15 and 17, twenty-two will give birth. This may contribute to another unhealthy trend. The number of low birth weight newborns continues to increase. We know from statistics that youth in foster care are more likely to engage in risky behaviors than other teens are. Therefore, when you see an increase in the general population of teens, you can be sure the increase among foster youth is much higher. In fact,... more

Many of the blogs I write are quite “heavy” because, after all, life in foster care is not a fun subject. Most of the kids don’t get to laugh often and as parents of foster kids, we don’t always get to laugh either.

Lately, Hannah has been cracking me up. Some things are just plain funny, and other are a six year old not quite understanding the other world yet. I thought I’d share some of these with you and hopefully add a little bit of levity to an otherwise hard subject.

One day Hannah and I were running errands and she was wearing her “fancy” shoes,... more

There are chatty kids, there are kids who talk incessantly, there are kids who ask really dumb questions, and there are kids who are a combination.

Kids talk for all sorts of different reasons. Some kids are just socially outgoing, which is my Hannah. Other kids are scared and talk to avoid memories or to avoid thinking about things. This is my Sammy. Still other kids talk to be sure that they are noticed or that they exist. This is my respite kid, J. J is a relatively good kid and is extremely mild on the attachment spectrum. In fact, many of his behaviors... more

Most states have limits on the number of children under the age of 18 who can live in one special needs adoptive home. For example, Massachusetts won’t allow more than six children, and in Michigan, the number is eight. That is eight children total under 18 years, regardless if they are birth, adopted, or foster care children. Of course, there are those adoptive families who are allowed a variance for exceptional reasons. One reason might be to allow a large sibling group to stay together in one home. However, for the most part the states try to adhere to limits. Why do most... more

Recently I was having a conversation with an adult adoptee, E. We were discussing the fact that some people can not see to grasp the fact that a child (grown or not) can love more than one mother or father. She was explaining to me how many of her extended family members were shocked when she began to search for her birth mother. They didn’t understand that it is possible for her to love both her birthmother and her adoptive mother. She wondered aloud if her adoption had been open (instead of closed as that was the era she was born in) if her extended family would have been... more

Do your adopted children seem to go a little nuts whenever you are not around? Maybe you are just running to the grocery store, or out to dinner with Super Dad. The children know you will be back soon, you always are. Yet, each time you leave the house, they hover at the door and behave badly for the sitter. While your children are at school all day, you get phone calls from teachers and principals. Your child has hit or spit on another student or a teacher. Another day your child has stolen property, runaway, been caught skipping class, committed forgery or has pooped... more

Over the weekend we were camping at a campground that I camped at many times when I was a kid. Friday night I was sitting outside by the campfire by myself toasting marshmallows. Yes, I am almost 40 years old, but I still love it.

While I was out there, I had a flood of memories come back about all the times that we had camped there before. I remembered how the mom of one of my friends would toast her marshmallows charred black on the outside and raw on the inside. We camped in big groups of ten or fifteen families at a time, and I remembered how we... more