An adoption blog is beneficial for many reasons, but the foremost being that it helps you document event and emotion. Adoption journeys are very often filled with highs and lows. I can attest that both of my adoption journeys were not only completely different, but both filled with events I learned and grew from as a result. There were also parts of both adoption journeys that seem like a complete blur. When the journey is over and the adoption final, there is this huge desire to push forward and regain some sense of normalcy. This is another reason why it is so important to document your journey. An adoption blog provides for such an opportunity and may help clear some of the more blurry moments after the fact. 

Part of learning and growing through an adoption journey is learning from mistakes and also rejoicing in triumphs. As you experience these triumphs, documenting them will not only be nice to look back on, but will be helpful if you ever adopt again. Adopting twice ourselves, my husband and I felt a little more prepared and knew the ins and outs of much of the paperwork and process. As we documented much of the learning opportunities that came with our adoption, we knew what to avoid, what to look for, who to hire, and what mistakes we could change the second time around.

Documenting your adoption journey in blog form is a fantastic way to keep family and friends informed about what is going on throughout the journey. While you will have to use discretion regarding what information you share due to stipulations on what you are allowed to share an when many of your friends and family may be invested in your growing family and want a way to keep up to date on news you can share. An adoption blog is a central place for them to go to get updates and also know updates will be posted rather than inquiring with you directly.

An adoption blog is also a great way to educate others on adoption and the beauty of the process. While my blog availability on a website is under construction, my blogging on social media has been met with a response from people I have never met but have felt inspired or connected through my adoption journey. I receive messages weekly from people all over the country wanting to know how to get involved in foster care and adoption. An adoption blog not only holds your memories and connects family, but it can also connect and inspire other prospective parents to pursue adoption and provide a child a forever home.

The post Why Should I Even Start An Adoption Blog appeared first on Adoption Blogs | Birth Mother, US & International, China.

1. Bad first impression

First impressions really do matter. Birth parents scrolling hundreds of profiles will look at the profiles that catch their eyes with that first family picture before reading a single word you write. Your cover picture should show your personality. Don’t use a picture that is too far away or too close in some cases (selfies are out). This may sound crazy but make sure the DAD looks good! Birth mothers are looking for a wonderful father figure and may possibly choose you based on who the male figure in their child’s life will be. Keep a look out for crazy eyes, red eyes, and or bug eyes. The picture can be spontaneous or professional, but keep it simple where the focus is on you!

 2. Failing to say why you are adopting

Always start with a Dear Potential Birth Mother/Father letter. Adoption is a very personal decision, so get personal from the start. Be upfront about why you are adopting. If you have suffered from infertility, say so; if you feel led by God to adopt after having bio kids, say so; if you have a house full of boys and long for a little girl, say so! This isn’t the time to sugar coat why you are the perfect family for adoption. 

3. Not being honest

Complete honesty is needed in adoption from the very start. Starting with why you are adopting but also the type of adoption you are expecting. Saying you want an open adoption and not following through is devastating to a birth mother. Include on your profile the type of adoption you seek; open, semi-open, or closed. This saves everyone involved time, energy, and emotions.

4. Writing too much

Writing from your heart is always a good idea. Keep your paragraphs informative without being too wordy, sappy, or boring your audience. We know you love your Great Aunt Betty, but really, now would not be the time to list all the great extended family support you will have! The profile is a snippet of your life, not a book. The first meeting with whoever chooses you should be guided by your profile. That first meeting is awkward enough without the potential birth mother knowing every detail of you before you meet. What will you talk about if she knows everything in depth!

5. Leaving out pictures

Pictures paint a thousand words. Not having enough pictures on your profile can hurt. Writing a paragraph about your hobbies without including pictures a potential birth mom may skip over that paragraph completely! Let your pictures guide your profile, and refer back to mistake #1 when choosing the right pics!

Samantha Morgan is a two-time adoptive mom and infertility survivor. Experienced in international and domestic adoption, Samantha loves sharing her motherhood story and experiences to help others find hope in their journey. Founder of Rush to Hope Ministries, she strives to build connections between people with similar paths so no one has to walk alone. You can read more from Samantha or get connected at RushtoHopeMinistries.com.

The post 5 Mistakes Adoptive Couples Make When Creating Online Adoption Profile appeared first on Adoption Blogs | Birth Mother, US & International, China.

Have you ever thought about starting an adoption Facebook page? Maybe you’re just not sure how to start one or even if you should. I thought these same things years ago and pondered on if I should start mine, but I was led to do so.

I opened my own adoption Facebook page to help me search for my birth family and for others to follow me on my journey. I hope it would give others hope in their own journey to find their birth parents. After I did find my family, I continue to have my page to encourage other adoptees to keep their faith and not to give up on their search. I also help others find their family through my page.

Positivity

One thing you do need to do is keep your page a positive page. This was something that was important to me. When you first start it, let that be the first thing you say is that this page is for the positive, not the negative. Trust me, there are very mean and negative people out there who don’t agree with adoption in any way shape or form. They will try to hurt you in any way they can. I’ve had several on mine that got real ugly and I’ve had to delete and block them. So on that note, keep an eye on your page and just delete those comments and block those negative people. Don’t let those negative people bring you down or hurt you. Just delete and move on.

Consistency

Make sure you post on your page every day or every other day to keep followers up to date on your page. Your followers love to hear from you. You’d be surprised what consistency can do to make a Facebook page thrive.

Engage

And though it might be an obvious bit of advice, always engage your followers. Reply to their comments, ask them questions, be more than just reading material. You can create an amazing community simply by interacting with other people in your Facebook group or who’ve liked your page.

I encourage you all to open and run an adoption Facebook page if that’s what you’re being lead to do. I’ll be the first one to say I’m proud of you! God Bless you all.

The post How To Run And Start An Adoption Facebook Page appeared first on Adoption Blogs | Birth Mother, US & International, China.

Ah, blogging! It can be fun. It can be frustrating. It can be cathartic. It can be infuriating, especially when blogging about foster or adoptive kids. We foster/adoption bloggers want to share the joys and challenges of our journey; however, we are constrained by the fact that we need to keep our child’s life private. An adoption blog can be a double-edged sword. 

Why should we keep our foster kids’ life private? First, out of respect for the biological family. Those in the community may not know that the biological family have a child in state custody. The stigma and shame of having a child removed from your custody is a real one. Bio families deserve that confidentiality.

Second, you need to keep your foster child’s life private for your own well-being and that of your child. Though, in my 12+ years’ experience in foster parenting, child abductions of foster children from foster parents is extraordinarily rare, there is always cause for caution. Always err on the side of caution.

Third, state law may prohibit revealing a child as a ward of the state, especially on the internet. If a child is not free for adoption, a foster parent cannot identify a foster child as a foster child. According to Federal standards like Reasonable and Prudent Parenting Standard (RPPS), foster parents may post photos of foster children, but cannot identify them as such.

The goal of RPPS is to provide youth in out of home care with a “normal” life experience.” But this must be balanced with the need for privacy and confidentiality. What follow are some ways to balance the two.

1) Initials:

Of course, the full names of your foster children should never be used on any blog, internet web page, or social media. Using alternate/pseudo names is appropriate. The easiest way to protect your foster child’s privacy is by using their initials (DW). Or by simply using their first name initial (D). However, bio family may recognize the initials and that may not be quite anonymous enough.

2) Abbreviations:

Using abbreviations in an adoption blog helps us to identify which foster or adoptive child we are referring to. For example, Foster Son, age 4, may be abbreviated as “FS, 4”; Adopted Daughter, age 10, may be referred to as, “AD, 10”. This way you can preserve anonymity in a large family.

3) Backwards photos

One creative way of taking a family photo while protecting the privacy of your foster child is to take a photo with everyone’s back turned to the camera. You can take the photo with just the foster child’s back turned but that would single him out as different. This way the entire family has their back turned, not just one person.

4) Children wearing masks

Another easy and cost-effective way of having fun with photos on an adoption blog is using masks! Halloween notwithstanding, masks are a good way to protect your child’s identity and to have fun at the same time!

5) Stickers

Lastly, stickers from Pic Collage or Pinterest are a creative way to give your little one some privacy. You simply download the sicker you want then drag and drop over the face of your foster child. It’s fun, it’s free, and it protects the confidentiality of your kiddo!

Pic Collage

http://pic-collage.com/

Pinterest

https://www.pinterest.com/search/pins/

Your child deserves to have fun and feel normal. Each situation is different and each child is unique. Use the method that best suits your needs and the needs of your foster child. An adoption blog can be fun for everyone, if done with care.

The post Creative Ways To Keep Your Child’s Life Private On Adoption Blog appeared first on Adoption Blogs | Birth Mother, US & International, China.

Blogging on an adoption blog can be a very rewarding experience. The adoption world is an unusual weaving of beauty and grief. In being authentic to the experience, you want to be honest and transparent on your adoption blog, but is there a boundary between writing a genuine piece and over sharing information? Before you press the publish button, you might want to ask yourself a few questions.

1. Unnecessary Information

The first question to ask is, “Is this wise use of the internet?” There are some general rules about what is safe to post. Full names, addresses, and birthdates, to name a few, make us vulnerable in the internet world. We have great, innocent intent in our blog posts, but not everyone has pure motives behind reading it.

On my blog, I stick with nicknames. For one, I generally want to protect my family’s identities from people looking to take advantage of that kind of information. Secondly, I want to protect my children from someone being able to type their names into a search and pull up any and all details I include on my blog. Generally, I try to keep my blog free of any information my children will want to keep private in the future, but I feel like I never know what kind of information a possible future bully would try to obtain.

2. A Word About Pictures

In speaking of impure motives, you may also want to avoid posting pictures of your child(ren). There is a split debate on this subject. Some say it is fine to do as long as the pictures show no nudity, others say no picture is safe. I can tell you I do post pictures of my children, but only those in which they are fully clothed. You will have to decide for yourself what you feel is safe for your family.

3. Embarrassing Your Kids

Another question I ask myself is, “Does this pass the 13-year-old litmus test?” That might seem like a strange question, but majority of my posts are related to my children. At some point they will be teenagers and the content I am publishing will still be out on the web. Will they be embarrassed by what I wrote? Will my post make them susceptible? What might seem funny or relevant in the moment may have lasting psychological implications.

4. Insulting Anyone In The Adoption Triad

Lastly, posting anything that would cast a poor light on other members of the triad is not a good idea. Generally, it is a good idea to avoid blogging anything that would be derogatory to someone, but the triad is especially sacred. Anything we say about someone in the triad will impact the third member. As an adoptive parent, are you saying something negative about a birth parent or vice versa? The adoptee then has belittling information about one of their parents out there. We always need to take into consideration what we are saying and how it will impact the others.

Writing out your thoughts within the adoption world can be quite a therapeutic task. Getting adoption friendly education out there gives us a deep sense of accomplishment. Connecting with others in the adoption world brings the relief of knowing we are not alone on this journey. In all of this good, there is one thing that can destroy it–pressing publish on a post that should not be for the world to see. Be careful what you write and a bounty of good will come out of your words.

The post 4 Things You Should NOT Share On Your Adoption Blog appeared first on Adoption Blogs | Birth Mother, US & International, China.